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The informative lectures and the lively discussions on each of the five precepts during the March 2005 Buddhism conference helped me realize the importance of being aware of my thoughts and behavior. The lecture on the precept of restraining false speech, in particular, helped me see how easy and natural it has become for me to lie, whether it is through exaggerations of events, feelings, expressions on my face, excuses made to avoid hassles and troubles, or just simple white lies. To make things more complex, I also learned the significance of knowing how my speech and actions may give rise to negative emotions in others, which is also considered false speech. So why has it become so easy for me to lie anyways, I wondered. It seems that discomfort and fear may be the main suspects, specifically, in saying no, being different from others, offending others’ feelings, or getting into troubles.
In this society that values outcomes and efficiency, false speech sometimes seem to be the easier way out of these situations. In the long run, however, more false speech may be generated, and one could end up falling deeper and deeper. It seems then that in order to break the cycle, I will have to learn to pause, check in with myself, and use wisdom to evaluate both the situation and my own motivations prior to speaking and behaving. I am very grateful to have had the opportunity to go to the conference and learn about the precepts, and I very much look forward to next year’s conference. D|M
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